summertime

I have been filled with nostalgia lately, mostly over my long, free and wild summers spent on the Idaho countryside with my grandparents. Growing up, it was the highlight of my year...grandma Coopers house. I know it might not mean much to the reader, but indulge me as I try to bring these memories to life. I remember the drive to Idaho, the heat, the random stops at Mcdonalds, the miles and miles of wire fencing and grazing cows. Back in those days, I don't know hwo we kept ourselves busy for those 10 hour drives, I just remember the anticipation was tangible. Over the yeras, I had the drive memorized and my heart nearly lept out of my chest when we made the final turn off the highway and I could see Grandmas house in the distance. Our legs were like jelly as we scrambled to get out of the car and the gravel under our bare feet stung like heck as we ran for the front door. Grandma and Grandpa would stumble out of the door with arms outstretched and huge smiles on their faces. I can almost smell the fried chicken baking and the mashed potatoes, thick and buttery and steaming with goodness on the table. It seemed like those summer days were like 20 hours long, with endless activities sponsored by our uninhibited imaginations, we would cover every inch of that farm from morning until night. The only thing that ever pushed our weary, scraped up little bodies back through the door for the night was the onslought of Goliath sized mosquitos that threatened to take our life...literally. I remember churning that homemade ice cream machine handle for hours just to have the joy of one small, delicious bowl before bed. I remember staying up until midnight (which was soooo cool and late when you are nine!) playing cards with Grandma. I remember my Grandpa playing old hymns on his organ while we played with old hand help video games on the shag carpet floor. And nothing tasted better than the terrible "sugary" cereal that flanked Grandmas pantry and begged to be eaten in giant, unnecessary portions, just because we could! I think it is the sunshine and my own children's growing summertime experiences that has caused me to reflect and feel the need to write down these memories.

Thoughts on Celebrity Rehab...and Jesus

I was watching Sober House the other day while I was working out (there was nothing else on), and I seriously just felt like I wanted to jump through the screen and INTERVENE... well, not me necessarily but the JESUS in me. I started to think about the Mary Magdalene and her Jesus encounter with the Alabaster box. I wonder how close these sweet and broken women were to that woman who captured Jesus heart and attention that night. I can picture Him walking into "rehab" and first and foremost demolishing every lying, thieving demon that has ravished every mind and soul in the establishment. I see Him picking up the pieces of every broken and devastated life and putting them back together...perfectly...right in front of unbelievably grateful faces. I see worn out, used up, love starved, human scared women falling desperately and helplessly into the lap of eternal love, finally unconditionally loved. Oh Jesus, show up, show Your Face, release Your light, I know people don't think they need you, but they so desperately do!

The other side to this story is the reality of the undeniable, uncontainable desire I have to see hurting, hopeless people experience Jesus Love. I know that it can change any person and any problem. God, please, please send people who need you into my life and then give me the courage to share Your heart with them.

Things troubling me...

Ok, I know that so many will read this and think I am crazy, but I know that alot of you will agree with me as well. I am seriously burdoned, saddened and concerned with the television shows like "Jersey Shore" and now "Jersey Licious" that showcase the most grotesque, defiling and hideous behavior of women. Illicit sex, gossip, lies, brawling, cursing, sensuality and seduction... is this what we want our young woman turning into? Is this the image that is being idolized by teen girls in America? Is this behavior admirable or desirable? It would be insane to think that there is not an agenda in this "reality" TV industry. I long for the day when true beauty returns to American culture\entertainment, when what is longed for and admired in the eyes of young impressionable teens is modesty, decency, respect of self and others, purity of word and deed, kindness, graciousness, truth and honesty. Unfortunately most of what people see on TV becomes their reality and ultimately their trajectory. God help us, heal hearts and bring to life all that is beautiful in your creation of woman. Help me to be that bright and shining example to all that are behind me and watching me.

Contemplating Jesus

I have been really overwhelmed the past few days at how proud I am... not in any one particular thing, but in comparison to the untouchable beauty, grace, love and humility of Jesus. I have to turn my head in shame at my sin, at my humanity. I guess I am just inwardly aware of how elevated and lofty I make my own opinions, assumptions and ideas about people and issues. My judgements and accusations sicken me. I am writing this honestly because when these times of the year come up and I am horrificly stricken with the reality of what Jesus went through, and more importantly who He IS, I am so deeply aware of how far I am from being anything like Him. Think about the Lamb, being led to slaughter... the Lamb that is God of the universe?! Jesus Christ is the most beautiful Name, the most wonderful thought and the most deeply penetrating and moving figure I have ever encountered in my life. He was laden with the grief of the world, He was scourged, He was mocked, He was completely obliterated for others... and I get offended when I get cut off on the freeway? Seriously. I can't put into words how deeply I want to experience the purity, humility and unconditional love of Jesus in my life and more importantly how badly I desire to see others transformed, impacted, broken and put back together by this same phenomenal Person. I am such a long way from knowing intimately what I perceive and have been taught, but the greatest gift of life is the journey we are on to know... to understand... to become.

Happy Resurrection Week!

Things I will miss...

Looking down at dimpled baby hands holding tightly onto a warm bottle while heavy eye lids melt into deep, much needed sleep.

Hearing little feet hit the floor and scamper toward the bedroom door on a Saturday morning.

The sounds of Sesame Street, mingled with baby coos and cries, coffee maker brewing and my sweet husband turning the front door handle and telling us all how much he loves us and will miss us.

Trying to make it through a family dinner at a restaurant; silverware flying, drinks spilling...

Family snuggle sessions on weekday mornings...warm little feet, tickling, kissing cheeks and laughing.

Why I am now a blogger.

I constantly have words, ideas, thoughts, opinions and emotions that I rarely capture on a daily or weekly basis. I want to start capturing these things, not only for my benefit, but for my children, my friends and anyone else who would like to listen. I used to love to write, I spent most of my childhood hours doing so, but after many years of term papers, reports and writing because I had to, I fell out of love with this wonderful art form. I hope that whoever reads this finds inspiration, identification and encouragement.